"MTG: Rubble Slinger" by Dopaprime (original) is licensed under CC BY-NC-ND 3.0
Stored inside our minds are characters we've absorbed from books, movies, and life. We draw from this arsenal of personalities when we create characters for roleplaying games, and we often assign gender based on the typical roles we've seen men and women play. While this can lead to some amazing characters, it can also result in unintended limitations and predictability. There are many ways to avoid that, and many reasons to try.
It can be interesting to examine the characters you've created to see which patterns stand out. Making a spreadsheet with information like gender, class, level, and such can help show trends you might miss if you're just working from memory. Have a look at the simple numbers first: how many men and women are there? If one gender greatly outnumbers the other, it might be because you have a default NPC that fills common roles with one gender. Examine how powerful or active male characters are compared to females. And then consider whether you've portrayed most females according to the stereotypes of the maid, the mother, and the crone.
The maid is often the young, beautiful sex symbol. In this guise, her major functions are being pretty, fertile, and available; she's usually a goal to be pursued or a prize to be won. She might be able to show a little moxy and play "hard to get," but that will only last for so long. She might be a naive figure to be protected, instead, in which case, the goal is to safeguard her. In either case, she's meant to be pleasant to look at and deal with, so she'll go along with what others want. The maid shows up in a lot of fantasy games as tavern wenches and princesses. She tends to be valuable only through their relationships with others and doesn't really have much agency of her own.
The mother is defined by her capacity for procreation, her nurturing nature, and/or her duties as a caregiver. She might be pregnant or in charge of children when she's first encountered. This also means that she's often an object to be protected and revered rather than a multi-dimensional woman. She reflects stereotypes that women are kind, emotional, and giving. On the other hand, not all motherly characters have children - some spend their time being responsible for other characters, including grown adults. Some mother characters remain sexy and sensual, but many are portrayed in nonsexual terms. One thing that the maid and mother tend to have in common is overall passivity. These characters do not tend to assert themselves and are generally vulnerable, if not victims outright.
The crone is designed to be the most unappealing category of the three. Despite the name, the crone isn't always an elderly character. Rather, she can also be the bitch, the ice queen, or the raving lunatic; the opposite of the sweet and loving mother, the crone hates, dominates, and cajoles. Crones are drained of their sexual appeal completely, even if they're portrayed with young bodies. These characters are granted few positive or admirable traits, and they tend to misuse any acceptable talents they have. They rely on deception and subtle influence rather than direct aggression (as with many female characters). Crone characters assert themselves but go too far and abuse others around them. They tend to be a bit more complex than mothers or maids and can make for great villains.
Through manipulating your established patterns, you can create potent changes in your game. While stereotypes offer ready shortcuts, it can be more engaging for everyone to go against the grain. Those playing female characters are probably going to want more than the old stereotypes offer, and players will probably be pleasantly surprised to see females presented different ways.
In most Western European nations during history, women were not allowed a terribly wide variety of roles in society because of many factors, not the least of which were patriarchy and childbearing. Roleplaying games don't always have the limitations of the real world, however. Women can be more than tavern wenches, mothers, and victims. Princesses need not be damsels in distress but real contenders to power. By reexamining and refiguring the roles female characters perform, we add a greater level of complexity to the game and throw a monkey-wrench into common stereotypes. Dungeon Masters, the next time you're creating NPCs, consider these archetypes:
Why couldn't the perrson destined to grow up, avenge their father's death and ascend the throne be a woman? For example:The king of the realm receives a prophesy that a newborn babe will grow up to overthrow him, so he orders the death of every male child under the age of two...but the prophesy didn't specify gender, and the destined baby girl escapes his efforts. Decades later, she's all grow up and looking for help to claim the throne, and the PCs might benefit from backing her.
The face of the law is often male in the mind's eye, but as we'e seen in our own world, women can serve in all the roles a justice system has to offer, from police to lawyers to judges. Showing women pronouncing verdicts and carrying out punishments may be enough to get your group's attention because it will probably go against their expectations. And there are various tactics for women to use in such work. While some may present themselves as strict disciplinarians, others can cultivate reputations as compassionate people who will listen.
Some characters don't take the world seriously. They drink, party, and sleep with anyone who comes their way. They might lie and steal, but a soldier can be a ne'ver do well as easily as a bard or rogue. These characters are often male because promiscuity and ribald fun are accepted more readily from men in our world; at the same time, women are usually held to standards of modesty and decorum. But women can be shiftless drifters as easily as others. Why not let them cut loose and have fun?
Consider gender when presenting "monstrous" races - those species that players aren't generally allowed or expected to portray but which make up the biodiversity of the world. Many species have females in sufficient numbers, taking on various roles in societies with their own social norms. It makes sense, then, for encounters with these species to include at least some girls and/or women. Often, women of certain species are only highlighted when their attractiveness is weaponized against male player characters. But female characters are more than femme fatales.
Including female characters regularly in a variety of encounters, from across the spectrum of attractiveness, keeps players on their toes. Showing succubi who aren't interested in seducing just anyone because they're busy manipulating special targets - with and without sex as a factor - can wreck players' expectations in the best way. So give a range of appearances to every species, and avoid the urge to make physical ugliness a sign of moral decay. And don't feel like you have to reproduce what's shown in official game art.
A lot of games have a wiseguy, so why not have a wisegirl? The sarcastic, bemused, cynical member of the crew can give the old banter a different spin when they're female, working against gendered expectations. Rather than making her the butt of jokes or simple comic relief, let her deliver true, biting satire and morale boosts when their groups need them most. Anyone can deliver surgical sarcasm, provided they have the intelligence and timing, and we have more examples of women in this role in media now. Associating it with a gender isn't necessary.
An average game is full of tavern wenches, but surely women perform more than just food duties. Try inserting some female blacksmiths, armorers, merchants, and minstrels. Likewise, try some female barbarians, bards, and paladins. A regular mix of genders across the professions can set your game apart and give you more chances to include girls and women. When the default for everything is male, it's no surprise when the world seems overwhelmingly male and masculine, even when that isn't actually the case.
Just as there can be lone kings or heads of state, there can be lone women in power as well. Show brilliant female tacticians, feminine military minds, and carefully diplomatic women. And don't forget that just as a man can rule with an iron fist, so can a woman. A group might expect a queen to be sweet or a pushover, but you can really send them spinning with an efficient lady who's a natural leader who knows what she wants and how to get it.
There can be advantages to female villains. Some may underestimate them, much to their regret. Chivalric beliefs could make it hard for the public to suspect female villains, let alone stop them. Motherhood can make a great shield for a villain; as mothers of dependent children and while pregnant, they can take advantage of extra sympathy. Women are stereotypically thought to use sexual attraction to get what they want, but what if sex is the one arena of life in which a villain is honest? What if an otherwise toxic woman is looking for a connection with someone who believes in her? Whenever you make a female adversary, take a moment to consider what gendered stereotypes you're using and how to complicate them.
You can run a game in any kind of setting you want, with any kind of power dynamics you want. You can run the whole gamut and show different power structures with each new city, or you can set up contrasts between larger entities, like countries. In some areas, women might still be confined to being daughters and mothers while women fifty miles away enjoy leadership roles and judicial power. Adventuring parties often get to experience the spectrum of cultures, races, and laws - why shouldn't they encounter a spectrum of gender politics?
Consider the placement of power when you create cities or run pre-made locations. Don't assume places from pre-made settings are patriarchal; give them some variety. Likewise, don't think that all lawful good places are egalitarian and all chaotic evil places oppress one gender. Play with the dynamics of gender, power, and alignment. How might a lawful evil city be made even more complex with a matriarchal underpinning? How might an egalitarian neutral evil kingdom work? Gender-based expectations - like those we have about bodies, social roles, clothing, and mannerisms - can all be tweaked as you design societies. This layering effect lends to depth to storytelling and realism to an entire world. (Learn more about location alignments here.)
There have been efforts in recent years to draw more women into playing D&D, and with many good reasons. Women make up a good percentage of the video game market and their dollars are wanted, and many groups welcome women in any case. The publication of Confessions of a Part-Time Sorceress and the creation of Astrid's Parlor - a message board dedicated to women's issues in D&D - brought women into the limelight in 2007, and not always in easy ways. Some questioned why a special board was needed for women, why certain elements were sexist, and so on. (Astrid's Parlor closed in 2012, as far as I know.) I think a lot of disagreements are rooted in something we're all affected by, even if we don't fully understand it: sexual objectification.
"What," you may ask, "does sexual objectification have to do with gaming? It's just a hobby, a fantasy; we don't want ugly feminist terms in our fantasies. And it's not a problem, anyway, since we treat everyone the same." And many groups do treat everyone with equal respect. But there are also groups that reduce female characters to sexual objects regularly, with various levels of awareness. Maybe they think it's funny; maybe they're only interested in women if they're foes or bedmates. Others don't even realize they've done it because it happens in character, inside the ficitional reality of the game. In some gamers' estimations, anything goes inside the fantasy - if monsters and magic can exist, why not misogynists? If dwarves are usually miners and halflings usually are rogues, why can't most women be tavern wenches? They're not real people, after all. Where's the harm?
Where, indeed? But fictional conditions can affect the group in real ways, and objectifying female characters can make female gamers feel unwelcome and unsupported. In some games, women aren't really present at all, the way they aren't present in old war stories - even though there are many accounts of women in various roles in many wars. In other games, women only show up in more "historically plausible" roles, like the tavern girl, the prostitute, the damsel in distress, and the mother. A number of gamers claim that historical accuracy must be a priority. So long as the whole group is actually having fun, so be it. Yet how many female gamers encounter these situations and feel disappointed? How many withdraw from groups - and the hobby - because they don't want to face potential arguments when they too just want to have fun? Being the only female character in an adventuring party can be challenging enough without being the only female character of any substance in the whole world.
The more confrontational the group and the more discriminatory the methods, the easier it is to point fingers. Some groups have assigned female characters special penalties simply for being female. This is often rationalized for pregnant or menstruating characters based on demeaning stereotypes. Some games have had class restrictions for female characters, although these games have been relatively rare (and are even moreso now). Female characters might be made the butts of frequent sexual jokes, while male characters are not. And some Game Masters overemphasize the sexual power of female characters to such an extent that they their stats and fantastic abilities matter less than flirting and sexual favors. It isn't difficult to see how a female gamer might be put off by such things.
The artwork in gaming books is a perennial point of contention because gamers look to the books for models of competent heroes and villains. Traditionally, they've found women who were drawn more for sexual appeal to heterosexual male viewers. But when a woman shows up half naked for a fight, it's difficult for some gamers to take her seriously. Why would you leave your chest or your midriff undefended, if you're a serious combatant? Why would you be shown in a pose that shows off your legs or butt when you're fighting? The simple answer is that you wouldn't, and by emphasizing titillation over the many other functions of female characters, power is given to the viewer and credibility is taken away from the character (and, in some people's eyes, from women as a whole).
Thankfully, there have been major efforts to show women in a variety of roles and poses in recent gaming art. In full adventuring garb and festooned with tools, female characters look like they belong in battle and can hold their own there. The cover of the 5th edition Player's Handbook has a fierce warrior woman covered from her neck to her feet; her clothing is still form-fitting and her body shape is ideal, but she's about to unload a spell in the fire giant king's face. Women are shown in poses that frame them as credible threats, wielding weapons like they know how. Their musculature varies, as do their breast sizes. Some pieces still focus on prettiness and that's fine. Many female characters have idealized looks and light skin, which isn't great, but real strides have been made despite pushback from a loud contingent in the gaming community.
From what I've seen, women want to play powerful people who have many ways to shape the world, first and foremost. They want to roll good stats, use amazing abilities, and be respected for what they and their characters can do. While gender comes into play in different stories, at the end of the day, women want their characters' personas and decisions to count the most. In this, female gamers are just like male gamers. While some women like their characters to be beautiful and don't care about how much flesh is revealed, others want to get away from the constant pressure for women to be attractive. They don't want to see sexualized roles and behavior at every turn. In general, they want to see women who look like active, plausible heroes with confidence that comes from capabilities beyond sex and beauty. Their concerns deserve to be taken into account, too, and all gamers benefit from more variety and respect in the hobby.
Not all female characters are portrayed by women in your average roleplaying game. Game Masters portray female characters as a part of their effort to portray the world around the player characters, and not all FMs are women. Some Game Masters don't feel comfortable portraying the opposite gender, especially when they don't feel well-versed, have naturally deep voices, or are running for all-male groups. Some seek out tips; others stick to third-person descriptions. Major concerns tend to revolve around not feeling silly trying to portray a woman when you're not, and vice versa.
There aren't usually many problems when a female player chooses to play a male character. They may seek advice and take time building a male persona, and there might be some joking, but it's rare for anyone to be offended. A female player might have more opportunities to join in activities that take place in all-male adventuring parties. A female character might not join the group at the local tavern/brothel, but a male character might be more welcome to carouse with the rest. A female player might find it easier to mesh with the party if she's playing a male character, and might feel less pressure to focus on physical attractiveness when building the character. Best still, a woman can have a lot of fun trying something new, and a male character might add unexpected joys to her roleplaying experience.
Difficulties can arise, however, when men want to play female characters. A few gamers play women to make fun of them in many ways, from their voices to their values to their bodies. Others do so to act out sexualized lesbian fantasies. Some players believe that portraying a female character will offer them different routes to power, namely through sex or sympathy. By playing a harsh, forbidding woman, some players get away from feminine sexuality and focus on the social power that women purportedly have. By focusing on sexual favors and influence, other players try to seize advantages they imagine all women have. Such female characters often become little more than ongoing jokes. It shouldn't be difficult to understand why gamers might be unhappy with these choices.
Sadly, it can be just as difficult when male players genuinely want to play female characters, and not for the sake of ridicule. This can spark very negative reactions, often in other guys at the table, usually due to homophobia, sexism, or both. I don't use these terms lightly or incorrectly. I am also not saying that all gamers are homophobic or sexist, or that gamers are more likely to be than others. But it's important to call out unfairness and to call it by the proper names so we know what we're dealing with. We may not be aware of why we feel the way we do, and we may have stronger emotional reactions than we anticipate when non-standard elements come up at the table. But if we actually care about everyone's fun, we need to be more aware and considerate.
When feminine traits are demeaned in men simply because they aren't "masculine enough," even in fictional characters they're portraying, sexism has reared its ugly head and taken bites at men and women. When common feminine traits are devalued and mocked as being weak, silly, incompetent, or worthless simply for being feminine, that's bias against women. When men who want to try on a female (and/or feminine) character in a fantasy environment are constrained and demeaned for that choice, it's unfair to those men. Some gamers may struggle to understand why a guy would want to play a woman when they could easily embrace hyper-masculine characters instead. Many TTRPGs simulate combat, tactics, and other experiences associated with masculinity. Why pass up a chance to indulge in hyper-masculine fantasy? For the same reasons that some gamers want to play species other than human - to consider different aspects and have a different experience.
When feminine traits in men are attributed to being gay and put down on those grounds, bias against same-sex attraction is evident. Whether it's based in fear or not doesn't matter; disgust, anger, and other intense negative reactions are just as harmful. Even if male players insist they're straight, they may not be believed for no other reason that they want to portray women. Some gamers might assume these men will portray heterosexual women and act out attraction to male characters, when that may not be the case. And even if it happens, it will involve fictional characters in a fictional setting, and the group should have already decided whether flirting and other romantic options are available and can be acted out. A male player could be gay or questioning his gender or sexuality, but if he has the same respect as others at the table, he won't be ridiculed for choosing to portray a woman.
When male players are mocked for acting in effeminate ways, whether they're portraying female characters or not, homophobia and sexism are likely present. Feminine traits are often not valued as higly as masculine ones, so when men act them out, they're seen as degrading themselves. Since gay men are known for being more effeminate, acting in a feminine way can also be taken as a sure sign of a man's sexuality - but gender expression and sexual orientation don't always work that way. And if you don't see non-straight people as lesser beings, it's unlikely that you'd react negatively to a player or character being gay.
Some groups are very open to players' desires, and that's great. Some groups are willing to give people the benefit of a doubt and let them experiment, which can be good for morale. Perhaps the group agrees to a trial run during a particular campaign, like a one-shot or a game hosted in someone's home rather than held elsewhere. It's okay to establish some considerations for everyone and check in later to make sure new concepts are working all around. It could be that gender portrayals are fine but the group can't handle any romantic interactions without breaking down into jokes and giggles. A GM can do a lot of good by establishing a supportive, respectful tone, no matter what's discussed. Tabletop roleplaying games can be important in gamers' lives, but they aren't more important than gamers themselves.
Some members of a group may not be ready or willing to experiment with gender or sexuality, and that's their prerogative. Some don't want to deal with either element being highlighted at the table because they're assumed to be volatile political matters and remind them of real-world struggles (though these folks probably won't have as many problems with male, masculine, heterosexual elements when they arise). A few may be willing to let others try playing different genders or sexualities, but find that they can't get past their own discomfort. It may be best to find another group that's more open - or create one from others you know - instead of pressing for more or agitating for changes that don't come.
However folks feel, real respect for the real people in the group should hold sway, and matters should be discussed without vitriol. People who really care don't just say it, they show it, not just when it's convenient or when they feel good but when unexpected and difficult issues arise. No one should be forced to be uncomfortable at the table, but they shouldn't be attacked or mocked for who they are or preferences that aren't harmful, either. Rules and restrictions should be equitable. The norms for the group should be agreed on. And if someone is targeted for negative treatment just for wanting to play a character of a certain gender or sexual orientation - in or out of game events - everyone else present should stand up for them right away. Because our characters may not be better than that, but if we're going to interact with other people and share pastimes with them in harmony, we must be.
If your group is thinking of incorporating these experiences, please visit my discussion of pregnancy and childbirth in gaming.
Even if you definitely do not want to deal with sexual assault or rape in your games, you may want to consider what I present in my article about those topics and themes in TTRPGs. Problematic behaviors and comments can occur suddenly and lead to major problems quickly, especially when a group isn't expecting it. I offer some advice on what to discuss with your group to prevent as many issues as possible.
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